The full story
The Full Story
I’m gonna start the story at the time of induction and go from there.
We arrived at the hospital about 6:00pm on December 10th 2009. At about 6:30 the nurses got the meds for the induction started. At 7:15 they started her pain meds as her contractions were pretty intense. They were giving her IV pain meds at this time.
At 10:15 her dr came in and broke her water and ordered the eipdural, which she received at 11:15.
At 1:00 am on the 11th the nurse asked us all to leave so A. could try to get some sleep as she tended to fight any meds to help her sleep.
At 3:30am her nurse came out and talked to us to see how we were and got us set up in a room so that we could try to get some sleep too.
At 5:30 we went to buzz the nurses station to see how things were. The charge nurse told us per the patient’s request they could not give out any info. Getting a little scared and not sure what was goin on, we went back to our room to wait. A few minutes later I received a text from A’s phone. It said that she and the baby were having some complications but that they didn’t want us to be scared and everything was gonna work out.
At 6:00am A’s boyfriend K came into the room with our camera bag and said she decided to keep him. I guess that K’s mom said that if she wanted to keep him that they could move in to her house and she would help them. (This IS the same mom who just days before told him if he didn’t have a job by the 17th she was kicking him out.) When he told us my body just shut down and I just collapsed. Luckily it was only for about 5 seconds. I then grabbed my stuff, pushed past K and we were GONE!
We went to our hotel and packed up. Checked out and were on the road home by 8:30am.
I think with the mom saying they could move in and having complications she may have gotten that motherly instict of “I may lose my baby” and that’s partly why she decided to parent. I wish her the best, I really do. I can’t hate somebody for loving their child and I hope she’s able to make it work.
We’ll be ok, and each day gets a little better. Thank you to each and everyone of you for your love and support. We couldn’t do it without you.
Edited to add: K is the boyfriend NOT the birthfather. They have been together since October of this year.
I’m gonna start the story at the time of induction and go from there.
We arrived at the hospital about 6:00pm on December 10th 2009. At about 6:30 the nurses got the meds for the induction started. At 7:15 they started her pain meds as her contractions were pretty intense. They were giving her IV pain meds at this time.
At 10:15 her dr came in and broke her water and ordered the eipdural, which she received at 11:15.
At 1:00 am on the 11th the nurse asked us all to leave so A. could try to get some sleep as she tended to fight any meds to help her sleep.
At 3:30am her nurse came out and talked to us to see how we were and got us set up in a room so that we could try to get some sleep too.
At 5:30 we went to buzz the nurses station to see how things were. The charge nurse told us per the patient’s request they could not give out any info. Getting a little scared and not sure what was goin on, we went back to our room to wait. A few minutes later I received a text from A’s phone. It said that she and the baby were having some complications but that they didn’t want us to be scared and everything was gonna work out.
At 6:00am A’s boyfriend K came into the room with our camera bag and said she decided to keep him. I guess that K’s mom said that if she wanted to keep him that they could move in to her house and she would help them. (This IS the same mom who just days before told him if he didn’t have a job by the 17th she was kicking him out.) When he told us my body just shut down and I just collapsed. Luckily it was only for about 5 seconds. I then grabbed my stuff, pushed past K and we were GONE!
We went to our hotel and packed up. Checked out and were on the road home by 8:30am.
I think with the mom saying they could move in and having complications she may have gotten that motherly instict of “I may lose my baby” and that’s partly why she decided to parent. I wish her the best, I really do. I can’t hate somebody for loving their child and I hope she’s able to make it work.
We’ll be ok, and each day gets a little better. Thank you to each and everyone of you for your love and support. We couldn’t do it without you.
Edited to add: K is the boyfriend NOT the birthfather. They have been together since October of this year.
posted by Jeny | 1:27 PM
8 Comments:
Wow- how incredibly painful for you all. Have you heard from A or K since? Did they apologize for the pain they have caused you? I just can't believe that after all the time you spent with them and everything you did for them, that they could change their mind. I feel awful for saying that because they ARE choosing to parent, which I suppose is good, but it seems like they can make this decision in a second but it will cause you so much pain. Anyways, rambling :) Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you
-Marci
Im sure you are going threw an incredible amount of emotions all at the same time.
But one day you will hold a baby in your arms and you wont be able to imagine life without it, and that in itself will make all this pain worth it.
You and nick are in our prayers.
Love monica
Marci- We have not heard from anyone since, and don't expect too, but that's ok with us right now. Maybe sometime in the future she'll send a letter, but that's her choice and and 19, I don't expect her to make that choice.
I am so sorry to hear all this. It broke my heart when I heard the news. You are being so strong through this difficult time. Before my parents adopted me, my mom was offered another baby boy. Lucky for me, that adoption did not work out and they heard about me shortly after. As you probably know already, everything happens for a reason. I pray for the best for you and your family! You deserve it and will be a great mom.
Let me know if you need anything! We are keeping you in our prayers
<3
It's funny how these stories are so common, yet so heartbreaking at the same time. I said the same thing as you when our BM changed her mind. How can you blame her for loving her child, and wanting to raise him? It would have broken my heart to give the baby up once she was home with me, so I get the emotions.
Thinking of you!
I am so very sorry Jen. Hopefully someday SOON all this will make sense when you do bring YOUR baby home. You are a strong strong woman. keep the faith. HUGS!
Alison (from FF)
Lots of hugs and prayers! You are incredibly strong! So sorry this had to happen to you. Here's to next time it being the right time. So, so sad... ((hugs))
oh honey, my heart aches for you! I can only imagine how much pain you are in...on one hand, it sucks that she wants to parent but on the other hand, she has that right. We are also in the process of adopting, and I keep telling myself that if a BM chooses to parent, I'm going to respect that and be happy for her because she was the baby's first mom. BUT I also know it will be hard too.
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